Ok this will probably piss a lot of people off, especially the die hards, but I'm not going to sit around and pretend it was good like everyone is doing. Let's get this straight, I love Harry Potter. I mean I fucking love Harry Potter. I love the books, I love the movies, and I love talking about it and what not in general. Do I think all the Harry Potter movies suck? No, I actually think they are all decent movies. I mean they're not all solid cinematic masterpieces, but this one just really sets a low standard for the franchise. Also disclaimer, I did not read the seventh book. Hate me on that but I am lazy and never got around to it.
What I should've read first....
So before I even saw this I had knowledge that this movie will not take place in Hogwarts. I was disappointed to hear that but I love Hogwarts. Hogwarts is the shit, Hogwarts is my people. However I figured they'd make up for it, nope. So the film starts off reminding us Dumbledore is dead (spoilers). It actually starts off pretty nicely with a bit of action and a good meeting up of all the gang, just like any other Harry Potter movie. Harry and the gang get mixed up usual shenanigans, but this time in the Ministry of Magic. In a getaway they land themselves in the middle of the woods somewhere.
This is where the film really starts to dip. So basically the gang is wandering around in the woods getting into trouble. Also they have a piece of jewelry which has some of the dark lord's power encased in it or something which they are out to destroy. This jewelry can also drive the wearer insane. Does this sound familiar to you at all? It's called Lord Of The Rings and the similarities are shameful. I mean if you're going to rip off the Lord Of The Rings at least rip off the good parts of it. Sorry to say but Frodo's part of the Lord Of The Rings was the boring part of it.
Trust me it's not that different.
So anyways the three of them are wandering the woods and Ron has a stick up his ass and goes apeshit every time Harry look at Hermoine. To be honest I got tired of the three which made me realize what this movie really lacked, characters. No Dumbledore, barely any Snape, no Sirius Black ;-;, barely any Luna, barely any Weasly twins, barely any Voldemort, and none of the awesome characters from Hogwarts we grew up with. To me that is what is the most disappointing part of the entire, instead I got Ron and Harry bickering the entire time who got to use their wand on Hermoine.
I'd probably cast a spell on her too.
After what seemed like years in the woods we finally reach our climax, where the Death Eaters have captured the gang. So I'm thinking oh sweet there is going to be some awesome wizard battle or something, nope. The Death Eaters make the same mistake every villain does and lets the hostage just chill unwatched. Then that stupid elf I never liked comes in and saves them. Then he leads them to an underwhelming climax in which he dies. I was actually kind of happy with that ending. Beside that I felt cheated to have the movie end on such a shitty climax.
Now I'm sure any Harry Potter fans will want to kick me in the sack for saying all that shit, but it's the truth. Am I looking forward to Part Two? Yes, because I don't want to see the franchise I love end in the toilet. They have a shot at redemption to save this one from the gutter. As far as my suggestion for a healthy alternative I'd go watch the Lord of the Rings since those are long enough to keep you busy until Part Two comes out.
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